Somewhere Only We Know ....... Page 3

  I bent my head and licked the end of his cock, it tasted salty. As I grew bolder I began to inch his cock into my mouth, licking and sucking and all the while I kept on stroking in with my hand. Eventually I managed to get most of it into my mouth, my ‘upchuck reflex’ sprung into action a couple of times but I learnt that if I pulled back a little it wasn’t so bad the next time I tried for the full length. I loved it. I could feel Shaun shaking and his groans were getting louder. I took my cue from the groaning and shaking and increased my hand strokes and sucking and then it happened. Hot come spurted into my mouth, the speed and amount took me by surprise but I managed to hold it together and swallow it all down.

  “Fuck me” said Shaun and all of a sudden I was shy again, but I inside I was ecstatic, I loved the feeling of power I had had over Shaun, that I had made him shake and most of all I had made him come by using just my hands and mouth.

  We didn’t speak as we sorted our clothes out but at the door he said “thank you, you’re great”. I was on cloud nine.

  At the end of the party, me and Jenny headed home and we giggled all the way back when I told her what had happened. “Wow” she said, “do you know how many girls Shaun Jessop has been with? Loads and loads, but I think you must have made an impression on him”.

  The next week at school I had the feeling that people were talking about me. Girls were giving me dirty looks and the lads seemed to be leering at me, it seemed word was out, I was proud and ashamed all at the same time. But the following weekends there was no shortage of lads trying to get with me and I enjoyed the attention. I never saw Shaun at any parties which was a disappointment but I usually managed to amuse myself with someone else once the boozed up haze kicked in.

  I think my mam and dad were really worried about me but it wasn’t until shortly after my 13th birthday that I noticed that their marriage wasn’t what it used to be.

  It was one teatime when my mam came in from work, I think I looked at her properly for the first time in months and I was shocked that although her make-up was perfect of usual, there was a definite bruise around her eye. I didn’t say anything but felt terrible that something was going on and I hadn’t seen it.

  A few nights later I was awoken by shouting downstairs. My mam and dad were having a full scale blast. I was about to go down when I heard my dad say “she is an absolute disgrace, you have no control over her Margaret, she goes off on a Friday night and we don’t see her again until Sunday night, she has marks on her neck and I told you what Geordie at work said, he saw her with a huge gang of older kids and they were all drunk and smoking. I’m telling you Margaret if you don’t get her sorted I’m off”. I went back to bed and pulled the cover up over my head. The row continued and on other nights I was woken up many times with the shouting and screaming and banging about, sometimes the rows were about me, sometimes about other things but one thing was clear, their marriage was in serious trouble.

  My mam and dad’s behavior didn’t calm me down, if anything I grew wilder. I spent all my spare time with Jenny, her home was always calm and happy whereas in mine you could cut the atmosphere with a knife.

  One thing that I found disturbing happened one Saturday morning. My dad always worked overtime and although I had stayed with Jenny on the Friday night, I had gone over home on the Saturday morning to get a top I wanted to wear that night. As soon as I went in my mam asked me if I would bring the record player down from my bedroom and put it onto the hall table and plug it in. She then appeared with a record and said when the phone rings, put this record on, answer the phone and play the record down the phone. I asked her why but she just giggled. Anyway I did as she asked and when the phone rang I played Doris Day’s Move Over Darling to the person on the other end. The record finished I put down the phone, took the record player back upstairs, collected my top and left the house. I never did ask who was on the other end of the phone, it was all just too weird.

  The next couple of months continued much the same, I partied and my mam and dad rowed. A couple of weeks before we were due to break up for the summer holidays Jenny dropped a bomb shell. She was 16 now and was just leaving school, she was starting work at her dad’s solicitor’s office at the end of August and as a treat before she went into the wide world her mam and dad had rented a villa for the whole summer somewhere in Spain. I was devastated. Even though I now had lots of friends, Jenny was my best one and the thought of not having her around for the whole of the summer was unimaginable.

  But a bigger shock was in store for me at home. I was summoned into the kitchen for a chat around the kitchen table. I thought here it comes, they are splitting up, but what I wasn’t expecting to hear from them was that we were moving, moving back to Kinsley!!!! Our house had been sold and they had bought one back in my birth place, a place I had visited infrequently for the past two years and somewhere I hadn’t lived for 8 years. My world was crashing down around me.

  Those last couple of weeks before Jenny went on holiday were unbearable. We laughed and we cried, we got drunk and we both whispered long into the night when Jenny eventually lost her virginity to a lad named David who she really really liked.

  The morning that Jenny flew out to Spain I couldn’t go and say goodbye. I stayed in bed in my usual position with the covers pulled up over my head and pretended I was ill. I heard my mam talking to Jenny when she came across to say goodbye but I couldn’t go down and see her and I wouldn’t allow her to come up. And then she was gone.

  A week later we moved back to Kinsley, to a replica house of the one we had just left. “New house new beginning” my mam chirped. The only good thing about the move was that we lived just along the road from my Granny’s house and my Granny took over Jenny’s role; without the drink, tabs, lads and parties of course.

  I met up with Jenny in Newcastle a couple of times over the next year, but I felt painfully shy around her. She was all grown up and sophisticated now that she worked in the solicitors and she seemed to have put her wild days behind her. She had settled herself down with David and they were saving to get married. When her dad died unexpectedly, I went to the funeral, I was also at her wedding and then we lost touch for a while. By fluke we both ended up working in the same office for a while, our friendship blossomed again and when she had her first baby David Junior I was his Godmother. After the birth of her second child Hayley, Jenny stopped working to stay at home to look after the children, we once again drifted apart. It wasn’t until years later when Facebook became the thing to do that we caught up with each other again and we became regular ladies who lunch. And I am pleased to say that she is still happy with David and they went on to add another two children to their family and they all live together, along with Jenny’s mam, who never married again as young as she was, in a huge house in Hexham.

  Endless Love

  Back in Kinsley it was a long boring summer. I had no friends and I just dreaded September coming when I would once again have to start a new school. I loved spending time back at my Granny and Granddad’s house, there was only the 2 of them there now, my aunts and uncles were long gone, so I had my own bedroom there for whenever I wanted it. The house was still always bustling, my cousins stayed at varying intervals and my aunties and uncles and their wives and husbands would always be popping in. Sundays there remained as always, the whole family arrived on mass for Sunday tea and the Peter Kay sketch about the family sitting around the table on emergency chairs always makes me smile, we did emergency chairs and two or three sittings. All in all my Granny’s house was my haven, and would remain so for the next 30 years, Hannah Hunter, my wise and loving Granny would also remain my closest confident and friend for the stretch of those years too. We had a bond forged at my birth that was unbreakable, even when I became unlovable, she managed to hold on to the belief I would turn out all right.

  That first day at school was weird. People from Kinsley recognised me, after all I had been spending my summers at my Granny’s house for years but I didn’t rec
ognise anyone. Even when they said they went to infant school with me I was clueless. But overall it wasn’t too bad. I think I was an object of curiosity - I was a townie so to speak and had all the edginess and know-how of a city dweller- I smoked and I flirted but I also kept the girls on side, I had trendy coloured hair which none of the girls in my year or the rest school for that matter had, so we talked hair and makeup and where the best and cheapest place in Newcastle was to get clothes. There was no way was I going to be side lined on my own again. But of course it was all an act, I didn’t really fit in, I was still different, now because I was street-wise and just a little bit wild. But I had another three years left at school and I had to get through it no matter what it took.

  The new beginning that my mam was hoping for didn’t happen. They were soon back arguing again, but this time I didn’t have Jenny’s house to go and hide at, so if I didn’t go to my Granny’s I just had to endure it. The arguments grew more frequent and more violent. There was often things thrown around, but I just stayed in my bedroom out of the way. My dad now had a new thing to do at the end of an argument, he jumped in his car and drove off. I would hear

  my mam sobbing downstairs, sometimes I would go down and try and comfort her, more often than not I would make my way to our small spare room and sit at the window. I would sit for hours and hours until I saw the headlights of my dad’s car turn around the corner and once I knew he was home safe I would creep back to my own bed.

  Obviously these late night vigils had a detrimental effect on my school work. It was hard enough changing schools but I was also constantly tired, I was so tired I just started staying off school. I would get dressed in a morning and leave for school as normal. My dad left for work at 7 but my mam didn’t leave until just before 9 so I would wait at the top of the street and when she left for work I would let myself in the house and put my feet up for the day.

  Soon I had friends popping in to spend the day at mine, I don’t know how we weren’t caught in the first week, I was cooking enough food out of the freezer to feed an army. But the truancy went on for months, sometimes I stayed home and sometimes I actually went into school for registration and then skived off before the first lesson. The woods behind the school was a good meeting place for all us truants. There was always tabs to be had and everyone always seemed to have the foresight to buy food to take with them using their dinner money. These were good times, there was always a different crowd so every time was different, but it was all brought to an abrupt end when my mam and dad were called into the school, my attendance was atrocious and as well as being put on report I was kept in - every night for a month, and the worst of this was I wasn’t even allowed to my Granny’s.

  I made lots of friends, but there was no one I could call my best friend. There was a large group of us girls and we rarely broke into anything smaller than groups of three, this suited me fine, I had done the best friend thing and that had ended up hurting me, so to have light weight friendships didn’t phase me.

  The party scene in Kinsley was sparse. Groups of us tended to hang around the local park or bus shelter. There was rarely an opportunity to party as even if me and my friends did have a parent free house, the neighbours were always quick to disperse any groups of people, Kinsley was like that, everyone knew everyone else’s business. We drank and smoked though and some people sniffed glue, I couldn’t get my head around that at all, it seemed to make them appear weird and a little off balance. I was bad enough with my alcohol so never dared to try the glue and aerosol thing but I still liked to go with boys.

  Around this time I discovered my weakness for crushes. I had them on all sorts of people, a lad in my class, some celebrity or other, a friend’s dad, even my science teacher, who was a pretty 20 something with gorgeous brunette hair, a petite body and the biggest boobs I had ever seen. No one was out of bounds. For the whole of the duration of the crush I was totally and unblinkingly obsessed. I fantasized about them, mimicked their mannerisms and would do anything to make sure I was noticed by them.

  Darren Roberts was a crush. He was beautiful. He was in my year group at school. He was Mr Popular and at 13 looked much older. His body was big and toned with the amount of sport he played and at 6 foot he towered above the other lads in our year. Being the school football captain he had no shortage of girls around him, he oozed maturity and wore his prowess with pride. On the back of his black leather jacket he had blatantly attached a football stud, he was a stud and God did I want him.

  I started to hang around places where I knew he would be. Football matches, shops, the bus stop where he and his mates always met up and eventually he noticed me. I don’t think that he hadn’t not noticed me before, but streetwise sexy Caroline had come out to play and there was no way I was going to let him out of my sight. His friend asked my friend to ask me if I wanted to go to a Newcastle match with him the following Saturday - what a result!!

  As confident as we both appeared when we were around our mates we both turned out to be really shy on our date. The conversation never stopped but it wasn’t edgy, it was nice, he was nice and I really liked him. When we got back from town he asked if I wanted to go to his, his parents always went out on a Saturday night so he said that if he could get rid of his younger brother we would have the place to ourselves. I was over the moon, that day just got better and better.

  And that was the start of my first proper relationship. For the next 3 years we were inseparable, we went to school together, spent breaks together, came home together and as soon as we had finished our teas we were back together again.

  Darren was the one that distracted me when my mam and dad’s relationship went into total meltdown. The arguments continued, but they also seemed to have grown distant from each other. The laughter in the house disappeared and they were forever sniping at each other. And as their relationship disintegrated, mine did too. I barely spoke to them, was moody and surly and stayed out of the house as much as possible. They were hypocrites and I didn’t like it, to the outside world, their Churchgoing friends they were Mr and Mrs Perfect, but if they looked at me hard enough they would see that the late night arguments were taking its toll and I was black eyed and ashen. Darren was my bright spot and very quickly the relationship became all consuming, I gave him everything, including my virginity.

  I didn’t have any hesitation, in the beginning we kissed continually, which obviously led to heavy petting sessions, I loved every part of his body, we would lie in his little single bed on a Saturday night and I would lick and suck on his cock, bring him to the brink them stop. Id tease him for ages, until he begged me to get him off.

  For us being so young we were certainly in control of our sex lives and oh that tongue of his. His favourite thing was to get himself between my legs and lick my pussy while I sat on the sofa and watched the telly. I had only ever been fumbled down there off lads, I knew how to get myself off quickly but to have someone use their fingers and tongue to bring me to organism was just amazing.

  By the time we actually got around to having penetrative sex I was ready for it. I trusted Darren, he knew my body inside out and wasn’t a virgin so knew what to do. From then on in we gave the Karma Sutra a run for its money. We couldn’t get enough of each other.

  With what was happening at home and Darren my school work suffered. Darren and I often played the nick, so when it came to exam time I struggled, I had always been bright but when it came down to my exam papers it was obvious that I had missed too much, any thoughts that my mam and dad had that I was University material were out of the window, but they had to take some of the responsibility for that as well mind.

  Shortly after my 16th birthday my Granddad died. I was devastated, I had never had anyone die and found the whole thing a scary and lonely experience. My usually sane family became a group of weepers and wailers and I didn’t know how to handle it. My mam and dad seemed to pull themselves together and my dad comforted my mam and helped her through the ordeal of the funeral
. It seemed to be a turning point for them and although their relationship would always be volatile, they seemed to have at least met on some common ground.

  My Granny went into some type of shock, she busied herself with arrangements and making sure everyone else was ok, but when I stayed with her she roamed the house all night. It wasn’t until after the funeral that the family seemed to return to some kind of normality.

  And all the time this was going Darren was there for me. Whereas before my mam and dad hated the relationship and wouldn’t allow him in our house, now they welcomed him with open arms, probably glad that he was taking me off their hands.

  And then my world went tits up.

  One Day in Your Life

  My mam and dad were still regular churchgoers and every now and then I was dragged out of my bed on a Sunday morning, usually nursing a hangover. I always complained that it wasn’t my thing but it fell on deaf ears. So off I’d trot with a face like a backside for the duration of the service. Anyway, on this occasion I fainted. I’d never fainted before so when we got home all hell broke out. I tried to tell them that I had been drinking but they were having none of it. The

  main topic of conversation was had I been having sex? “No no no!” I protested, but on the Monday morning my mam marched me off to the doctors where low and behold her ‘virgin’ daughter was pregnant.

  My dad, always the disciplinarian was furious, I was going to be kept in forever. They just went on and on about what a disappointment I was and how I had shown them up. Inwardly I was delighted. A baby all of my own and the first opportunity I had I went to find Darren and tell him the news. He was terrified, but when I said that it meant we could be together in our own little place he was as pleased as punch.